i don't like darkness

A Criminal Minds fanfiction focusing on mental health, complex PTSD, and lesbians.
Click here to read on AO3!

There's a certain amount of gray area that comes with working at the BAU. The violence and gore the team is exposed to wears down at them, and they're left to wonder if they're really doing anything at all, if they're making a difference, or if this is all worth it. They catch one unsub, just for another to take their place.

For SSA Emily Prentiss, that gray area is just a bit bigger (well, maybe more than "a bit"). She's struggling with something a little more... personal.

After a particularly grueling case, she finds herself torn between who she thinks she is and who she really is. What she doesn't know, though, is that both of those identities exist, and one of them is about to come into light for the first time in many, many years.

Emily Prentiss OSDD AU.

Backstory

This fic is basically a combination of some of my most favorite interests. I love Criminal Minds with my whole heart, even the parts that some people think are stupid. I LOVE the show. I also love psychology, including abnormal psychology, specifically complex trauma, complex PTSD, and dissociative disorders. I'm also a lover of lesbians, in this context JJ/Emily. I'm queer and ~traumatized~ myself, so this fic has a special place in my heart. As I update more and more, I go back and read through what I wrote, and the storyline has become a bit of a reflection of my healing. Whether it's a good story to read is up for debate. Whether it was good for me to write it is a different question.

This story gets updated slowly! Please bare with me.
Most recent update: Feb 22 2024